The B Word



Greetings from my couch to yours. I am finally feeling caught up. I feel like I've been treading water the past few weeks. Just so much to do, not enough time to do it. (yet somehow I managed to watch four hrs of the Bachelor this week. don't judge) And meh technically not four hours more like two hours and forty minutes so there. I'm not excited about the next Bachelorette fyi.

Anyways, things are finally slowing down for me. I don't want to be busy. It's not cool to be busy. So I'm not gonna talk about it because I don't want you to think I'm busy. I don't wanna be that guy.

Ok fine, I'll talk about it just so I don't forget. I subbed for my friends pre-school class for two days. And who does that?! I technically have no real teaching experience nor interest in teaching I might say. But literally, my dad, my mom, my brother, my sister, my husband, my father-in-law, and my brother-in-law can do it. Why can't I? And it really wasn't too bad! Turns out, it was almost exactly like what I do every day. (Kevin Malone Office voice) So that, plus some random events happening in the evenings, plus a couple work deadlines, plus like multiple major church responsibilities, oh and plus the time change. I kinda felt like I had been hit by a bus.

I quit my job last year so I could be involved in more things. Do a better job around the house (ha!), be more focused on being a mom and wife, plus be able to be more involved in our church. And I need to remind myself of that sometimes. Like this is what I wanted. I am still working freelance about 10 hrs a month now. And I feel very lucky to have that. It's not something I had planned on or even thought was an option. But here it is. I guess that's a God thing.

We went to a Work as Worship retreat at our church. It was amazing. And it really gave me a spark. A spark to be excellent at what I do. Not that I didn't try my best at my work, I did. But I didn't value myself or my work as much as I should. I didn't really think about how doing my best and being professional reflected my God. So I'm gonna up my game. I hit the ground running after college and my portfolio looks like it. Nothing has been updated in the past eight years. I've been too busy working to spend any time on how I actually present myself. So the plan is to get a website. Nothing fancy but a couple of recent projects, take some nice photos of my work to use, etc. Maybe a business card (does anyone use those anymore?)

I think I've looked down on myself for being in limbo. Am I a mom? Am I a designer? I'm certainly not a basketball player anymore. I'm still figuring myself out but I think I'm headed in the right direction.

I started a vacuum fund in my budget app. I googled best time to buy a vacuum and it said spring cleaning/mothers day (sad! lol) type sales are usually the best. Do you think I'm good just like not vacuuming till then? Yes, my vacuum currently works, but works well? Not really. So what's the point?

Do you research things? I feel like I'm always randomly researching/looking up multiple things at a time. Lately, my browser tabs have been out of control and that was stressing me out too. I told my husband I just feel like I have too many tabs open in my brain. Cue emotional breakdown. Just to humor you things I've been looking up in no particular order: vitamins, campsites in South Dakota, external hard drives, computers, best airline mile credit cards, Josh Garrels concert tickets, graphic designer pay rates, plus several google docs tabs, oh and a book I want to read. That's all I can think of right now. I am living the dream.

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